Written by Mister Meaner
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Tuesday, 9 October 2007

image for Posh Spice Muscles Onto Diana Inquest Jury
Diana, Posh and Chanelle from Big Brother

There was a surprise new contestant in the Princess Diana Competition yesterday, when Victoria Beckham, wife of the American footballer David, joined the jury.

Beckham, real name Posh Spice, visited the crash site in Paris where Diana and her rich boyfriend Dodi al Fayed met their ends, and insisted that she be allowed to take part in the very important decision about whether or not the Princess was killed lawfully.

Dressed in a short black dress designed by one or another of her camp designer friends, Spice strode manfully into the tunnel 'where it all happened', and made a snap judgement - to remove her enormous spectacles, and to change into a long, flowing Versace evening gown for her supper.

The inquest has already unearthed a mountain of interesting information about Diana, such as she was once married to Prince Charles, loved to 'go' down the gym, single-handedly diffused land mines, and was a good friend of many men.

Yesterday, as the jury was shown the exact spot in the Pont d'Alma tunnel where the tragic group finally came to rest, Lord Justice Baker said a short prayer for the group. Spice, who has said she now wishes to be known as Princess Posh, added her own ill-fitting tribute to Diana, running through a couple of choruses of her latest single Tell Me To Drop Dead.

The inquest is expected to last too long.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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