High placed sources in the Bush administration, speaking anonymously, have reported that intelligence communities have intercepted a top secret memorandum revealing plans by Al-Qaeda to develop a whole new family of SWMDs (silly weapons of minor disruption).
One of the weapons, called a VFA (verbal flatulence aborter) can be delivered by intercontinental ballistic missile, find Rudie Guiliani, put a clothes pin on his tongue and make him sit in the corner with his back to the class for 30 minutes.
The Bush Administration is drafting an Executive Order declaring a state of national terrorist alert and authorizing federal, state and local police, as well as born again Christians, to arrest individuals found laughing at Rudie on YouTube videos of the Republican Presidential debates and deport them to Guantanamo Bay without habeas corpus.
The executive order, further sentences individuals protesting the order to 30 days in solitary confinement with Chris Wallace. Mr. Bush was busy watching "Pink Elephants on Parade" and not available for comment.