A new study conducted by the World Centre for Journalistic Brilliance, headed by Timmy Rosenthal, has shown that journalists who are employed create different types of news stories to members of the public.
"We took a snapshot of the week's news around the web, and found that editors of more traditional sources of news were interested in what they were told to be; while 'civilian editors', as we like to call them, could write about what they wanted to as long as the media deemed it acceptable." said Timmy.
The revelations have rocked traditional centres of journalistic excellence, such as the Houses of Parliament bar. "The fact that we cannot control what people write is frankly terrifying!" one apparatchik was heard to say. Other senior figures were reputably as concerned, while a small minority of heads of state were not at all bothered. "There are two ways: my way, or the highway!" crowed one dictator of an African country enthusiastically, "The highway might well be covered by broken glass and live electrical wires, but there you go. You pays your money, you takes your choice. You don't even pay your money, unless it's to me, ha ha ha!"
Leaders, dictators and authoritarians can relax, however, as it seems all the so called user generated content is entirely concerned with what colour the new ipod case will be.
The report finishes on a high note, by claiming that only 1% of all work is original but does not make it clear of which bit. "All I can say for certain is that I copied this report from somewhere. Not sure where." Timmy Rosenthal glibly gushed.