Written by Robert W. Armijo
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Monday, 20 August 2007

image for Bush Administration claims: flooding in England not global warming; merely glaciers attempting to illegally immigrate
Another undocumented glacier headed our way; quick document it so it can be our guest worker glacier

London, England - Bush administration officials finally released a comment regarding the massive flooding in central England this summer, blaming it not on the increasing signs all pointing to global warming but glaciers attempting to illegally immigrate into England. They are even suggesting that England should adopt a policy toward illegal immigration similar to its humane one as well to prevent further illegal crossings of undocumented glaciers.

"They are very sneaky those undocumented glaciers," said White House officials. "They disguise themselves as clouds filled with water and come down out of the sky looking like rain drops, but they are really glaciers attempting to reconstitute themselves on English soil, taking the jobs that English glacier's won't do."

The Bush administration suggests that England adopt a humane policy similar to that of the Americans in dealing with the undocumented: by building a wall to prevent further illegal incursions; send back everyone one who is undocumented (just don't call it deportation or repatriation because it includes their US born American citizen children born after 2000 as well) back to their country of origin; have them fill out a pile of endless forms and applications while they are there that would give any bearcat a wet dream; have them pay enormous fines and fees, which they will find more than difficult to afford; and then finally let them back in for a couple of years to continue at the low paying jobs they had before and then you send them right back over the boarder to start the process all over again.

"It's the American way," said Bush. "And it can be your way too, England, except it's really ours."

Global warming experts say massive populations will be dislocated due to flooding, causing strife and possibly armed conflicts between nations, if global warming is not dealt with now.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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