Written by arkticcool
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Topics: Vatican, CIA, wikipedia

Sunday, 19 August 2007

image for CIA and Vatican take on Wikipedia
The pope in his address as to why the world should remain ignorant under his regime.

Washington D.C. (The Lies) - Reports from our uber hacker nerds have stated that the CIA and the Vatican have, for the past five years, tried to take out the world's biggest encyclopedia, Wikipedia.

According to our sources the CIA and the Vatican have worked in cahoots to complete their mission of complete world ignorance, both citing their own unreasonable reasons.

In a joint statement released last night the Pope defended his recent moves by stating that "People aren't smart, we've been telling them what to think, believe and do for two whole millennia. Why would we stop now, we've prospered under your stupidity, you're all gullible. Muhaha!".

The CIA stated similar reasons saying that the world "can't handle the truth!" and "How do you expect America to take over the world with all this knowledge flying around? We covered up the fake NASA landings with ease, Wikipedia should have been the same, its just another political maneuver, like the fake Cuban crisis.". The spokesman then proceeded to shoot himself on the grounds that he had revealed too much.

The recent revelations have come amid speculation that the United Nations is in on the act and willing to give food for oil kickbacks to the first person that vandalizes 100,000 articles. In a statement made today a UN spokeswoman stated that, "We are willing to give billions of dollars to the first person that can remove all the human rights abuses caused by our forces around the world.".

A tact less take down, it has been criticized upon by leaders around the world including President George W. Bush who was quoted saying, "I can barely speak English let alone read it, don't expect me to make decisions.".

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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