Written by Fergus McCarthy
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Topics: Ron Paul

Monday, 20 August 2007

image for Ron Paul: President or Pornstar?
Ron Porn French Idol

Presidential hopeful Ron Paul was shocked to the hard core today when a French newspaper conducted an opinion poll asking it's readers what international names they recognized and what position they held in world affairs.

No photographs were used in the survey, only a list of names on a whiteboard.

'Kim Jong Il' was correctly identified as North Korea's long term dictator by 78% of those polled with new British Prime Minister Gordon Brown instantly recognizable to French readers with 84%.

U.S. Presidential hopefuls were also on the list with Senator Hilary Rodham Clinton the most easily recognizable due to her 8 years as America's 1st Lady and long suffering spouse of ex President Bill Clinton coming in with an election winning 94% of those polled.

The inevitable Irish American candidate Barak O'Bama, with his flame red hair and freckles polled an impressive 56%, mainly due to his appearance on Oprah shown on Canal+ where he showcased his Celtic roots with a faultless performance of Micheal Flatleys Riverdance on Oprah's couch and a haunting rendition of Danny Boy that had the audience of silicone and botox enhanced yummy mummy's longing for the ability to express emotion.

In contrast when the shown the name of Republican hopeful Congressman Ron Paul 78% of Parisians confidently named him as 'Ze fat ugly American man wiz ze bad moustache and ze digusting fat bellee in ze porno films on Canalxxx"

So with his best years behind him as a porn star 'Ron Jeremy' may yet decide to enter the race for the White House under the slogan,

"All politicians will screw you, let a qualified professional do the job"


God help America.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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