Written by Cal Jennings
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Tuesday, 7 August 2007

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John Lennon Returns to Protest War

CCN - Crazy Cal News - Washington - John Lennon rose from the dead to attend a Million Man March on Washington, D.C. where United States citizens held an anti-war sit-in in front of the White House. Millions of protesters showed up to sit and sing "Give Peace a Chance" by candlelight with Lennon. Ron Paul and Dennis Kucinich signs were everywhere.

When the reporter asked Lennon how he came back, Lennon said, "Jesus sent me. He was going to come himself, but he said that I look a lot like him, and Bush wouldn't know the difference. He said that I was more popular than he is, anyway."

Lennon, Paul, and Kucinich got up before the audience and spoke to the large crowd that was overflowing the U.S. Capitol city. The message was broadcast on loudspeakers arranged all over the city. They spoke of love, hope, freedom, and the lack of need for huge governments.

"Freedom is Popular!" exclaimed Ron Paul. "Ever since Dennis and I called for the impeachment of George Bush, our popularity has SKYROCKETED! We're thinking of running together on our own ticket."

Just as Jesus had predicted, George Bush didn't know the difference between Jesus and John Lennon. The President, walking out with Vice President (emphasis on VICE) Dick Cheney to see what was going on, and surrounded by security, took one look at Lennon and screamed, "Let's git thuh hell outa' Dodge, boys! Jesus has returned!"

The president and his companions immediately evacuated the White House and took a helicopter to Air Force One to flee the country. They are expected to flee to Russia where they will take a rocket to Bush's new base on the moon. Maybe that will REALLY give peace a chance.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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