(MUSICMAN PRESS) Reports from the nation's capital say that the President failed the second grade. Early Friday morning, a Mrs. Wellington, a Texas teacher, brought Bush's report card to The White House, and presented it to Mrs. Bush, who was utterly displeased with what she found on a forty-five year-old paper.
"I can't believe that a married such a stupid moron. I can't take it no more. I 'ave to leave now! Tell him I don't wanna be married any more to that low-down, filthy person." said the First Lady behind crying eyes.
We were unable to contact the President. Mrs. Bush is in Texas, with family. And, as for Dick Cheney, he is in an undisclosed lactation, still.