CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Washington - Communist hardliner George W. Bush welcomed Mikhail Khodorkovsky to the Capitol today and appointed him to the cabinet of his New World Order regime. President Bush said that he has admired Khodorkovsky for a long time.
"That McHale feller is a real good ol' boy. He reely knows how ta' treet the little peeple. I used to watch his TV show, McHale's Navy too. I just luved him ridin' that boat an' sneakin' in corn sqweezin's," said Bush.
President Bush also welcomed him to the Corrupt Bastards Club. Since Khodorkovsky is wealthy and into oil himself, the president decided that he would make a "real fine addition."
As of 2004, Khodorkovsky was the wealthiest man in Russia, and was the 16th wealthiest man in the world. Much of his wealth evaporated because of the collapse in the value of his holding in the Russian petroleum company YUKOS, but President Bush, being an admirer, invested heavily in YUKOS before the War in Iraq.
"Heh, heh... Me an' ol' McHale are compodres now. He's a fine bizness pardner," said President Bush. "Thar's enuf oil under that sand fer the both of us."