Written by Monkey Woods
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Friday, 25 May 2007

image for Australian Big Brother In 'Stinky Undercrackers' Row
Sheila X looking a bit worse for wear

The Australian version of Big Brother is in hot water today, after producers on the programme decided not to tell one of the contestants that she was taking part in a reality TV show.

Sheila X of Sydney, became the focus of viewers attention when it became clear that she had stumbled onto the set unaware of what had happened to her after a particularly 'busy' night out drinking.

One of her 'friends', Chloe Pistake, watching from TV studios, said:

"She's a roight harfwit! Doesn't know what day of the week it is!"

Miss X, who cannot be fully identified because nobody knows her surname, became entangled in the show's cast after visiting various bars in Sydney just before the latest BB started, just over a month ago.

"She had a roight tankful! We just bundled her into a taxi and sent it to the studios!", laughed Bruce Koala, one of her drinking group.

The producers of the reality show readily entered her into the House, but came in for criticism when it was realised this week that Miss X didn't have any clean underwear, and had been wearing the same pair of skimpy undercrackers for nearly a month. Some of the other contestants started to complain, and one was overcome by fumes.

Experts have said that Miss X may still think she is in a state of paranesia brought on by excessive necking of pints, and that she will eventually 'come around'. Until then, audiences will be free to poke fun in her direction.

BB executive Steve Ripper told journalists:

"Crikey! Her undercarriage must really hum by now!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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