CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Washington, D.C. - Recent White House probes uncovered that most White House Republicans now serving in office are really undercover Russian agents. President George W. Bush was discovered to be a Russian monkey left over from the Cosmonaut program.
A defense department spokesperson, when asked, said, "We should have known when they called their campaign states the Red states. They could have used another color, like green or yellow, but they chose Red. Hindsight is better than foresight, you know."
In an effort to correct the problem, the United States Marines are being called in to remove the president and the other offending Republicans from office. The U.N. is offering their support, should they need it, to remove the phony Republicans from power.
Leading the U.S. Marines in the charge to the White House was Rep. Senator Ron Paul. "Give us Liberty, or give us death!" yelled Ron Paul as he lead the charge.
George Bush was caught by surprise because he thought that Ron Paul was referring to the Statue of Liberty, which he would have gladly given up.