Paris Hilton today leapt into the alliteration wars with her anti-ageing armpit cream. Following the success of Boots own brand anti-ageing cream which really works and takes twenty years off even the most gnarly example of womanhood, Paris has commissioned her own creation for "the most neglected part of a woman except her husband."
Paris expects her armpit cream, "Paris' Perfect Pit Prescription" to be snapped up by the rich and stupid. "At £459.00 per small tub, I'm obviously aiming it at the top end of the market," commented Paris, "women like Victoria Beckham and Geri Halliwell whose boob jobs are so ridiculous that they have caused massive wrinkling in the armpits."
She also claimed that at £459.00 her product will appeal to "the unwashed masses who can club together for a tub and have a bit each."