London - (Ass Mess): The Spoof has obtained an exclusive preview of a top secret letter sent to the awesome PR machine that runs global big oil where the shockwaves from the Corrupt Bastards Club and this week's resignation of BP's Lord Browne have sent tremors throughout the OPEC hierarchy.
An abridged version appears in this column and is published according to internationally accepted standards of parody and in the interests of free speech, cheap pump prices and a bit of a giggle on the side:
Dear Dr Omar Farouk Ibrahim,
As head of OPEC's public relations and information department I am sure you are aware that recent shenanigans among the Alaskan Corrupt Bastards Club and wannabe British members at BP have caused a bit of a stir in the hydrocarbons industry worldwide.
While your exemplary diplomatic stance on the subject has remained admirably sphinx-like there are concerns that you and OPEC Secretary General HE Abdalla Salem El-Badri may not be totally up to speed on the fast-breaking developments in the specialist niche market of oil industry satire.
We are therefore recommending you take out a free and gratis subscription to The Spoof, the world's top tin-foil-hat-busting website whose groundbreaking attempts to lay bare Corrupt Bastards Club conspiracies is a recognised market leader in the satire and parody business.
Many a true word said in jest, nudge nudge, wink wink, say no more!
Of course, you would be more than welcome to contribute your very own satitrical column on a totally anonymous basis here at the Spoof website. Veteran columnists of all ages, persuasions and inclinations would greet you warmly should you ever decide to do so.
Many feel that this would greatly enrich the unique flow of satirical possibilities flowing in this much neglected area of hydrocarbons industry reporting, as well as providing a little respite for you from the gruelling task of everyday life ruining...er sorry! running the immensely successful OPEC organization.
We look forward to hearing from you at our website address where your contributions, however little or large, would surely enrich the lives of many.
With all best wishes,