Paparazzi all over the world today claimed that crotch-shots are drying up in every country. One hack photographer commented, "A couple of months ago you couldn't take a picture without snapping something inadvertently flapping in the breeze, now nothing."
Another wistful pap sighed, "Gone are the days we used to hang around outside the hospital waiting for the latest car seat-scraping DNA test to tell us who's doing who in the celebrity circuit."
The worlds media has been quick to blame the current celebrity trend of bringing out fashion lingerie lines for the demise in their "money-shots" but another theory has recently emerged after it was reported that Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan, en route to a celebrity party became firmly suckered to the seat of their taxi. After 20 excruciating minutes, they had to be slid gently along the seats with the help of a pound of butter in full view of waiting photographers.
Hollywood hospitals were also becoming increasingly irritated at the increase in stars hobbling into their accident units with injuries such as, "severely chapped lips" and "trauma caused by taxi-door slamming."
In what used to be an open and shut case, celebrity vagina's are now staying firmly shut.