Written by matthatt
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Tuesday, 1 May 2007

image for Heather Mills McCartney's ex leg to headline Kate Moss catwalk show.
The Leg on a blind date earlier this week.

Following on from "The Leg's" tour de force on Dancing with Stars, Heather Mills McCartney's ex appendage has been the talk of the town and not just one town, but several.
London, New York, Paris, Hemel Hempstead, the list goes on.

Anywhere that you can find bright young things, the bold and the beautiful gather to become the neo-chattering classes.

The word on every one of the beautiful peoples collagen enhanced lips is "The Leg"

Being attached to HMM for this long has done more good for "The Leg's" career than a room full of Jades Goody's mouthing off at Shilpa Shetty.

Some say that Leggys meteoric hop to the new found, star studded, lap of luxury type lifestyle is all down to PR Svengalli and silver fox, Max Clifford. However, none can deny that "The Leg" has stellar talent and then some.

Mr Clifford said "the way the leg handles itself is amazing, it's as if it was created for fame and at the moment, in the eyes of the media and the public, this leg can do no wrong, every step is a good one!"

Simon Cowell, another PR type bloke has been gagging to get a piece of the action and is sick as a parrot that he turned the leg down during auditions last year, when it was just an unknown umbrella stand, trying to appear on his enormously successful "Stars with fake Thighs" "I'm a complete arse" said the high waist banded one "I had that raw untapped talent, like putty in my window and I just let it slip away"

More recently "The Leg" hit headlines again, following an embarrassing clinch with famous Hollywood actor, Richard Gere, who has been behaving like a randy drunk uncle at the family Christmas party for some time now.

Mr Gere and "L", as the leg has decided it wants to be called from now on, had been attending a charity event recently, when the ageing heartthrob rushed on stage, swept "L" up in a passionate embrace and proceeded to indulge in a spot of stump humping in full view of a slack jawed audience.

All the publicity surrounding "L" has prompted skinny waif and junky shagger, Kate Moss to employ "L's" services for the stateside fashion launch of her new range of strumpet clothing for young anorexics, all of which will fit the size zero leg perfectly.

Unfortunately, all is not smiles in the fashion biz.

Stella McCartney is said to be livid that at her pipe cleaner shaped chum, Kate Moss has purloined the appendage for her own ends.

Close friends say that Stella was hoping to do the same, just to annoy the legs previous host.

Make matthatt's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this


Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 2 plus 3?

7 5 19 11

Go to top