CCN (Crazy Cal News) - Tokyo, April 27 - Two rulings were handed down from Japan's highest court as Prime Minister Shinzo Abe tried to head off a resolution on Japan's wartime sex slavery in the House of Representatives during a two-day visit to Washington.
The judges said, "They're just a bunch of nappy headed hos and poor workers. Besides, the nappy headed hos made enough money turning tricks to fairly compensate them. Who cares about the laborers?"
Although the judges of the Supreme Court ruled against them, they did invite the nappy headed hos back to a hotel for Sushi. "We'll have a really good time," said the judges. The judges then took out their katanas and beheaded all of the workers. "That should keep them from filing frivolous lawsuits," said one judge.