Written by Monkey Woods
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Monday, 23 April 2007

image for Camilla Pose Raises Eyebrows In Weird New Royal Family Portrait
The Duchess is somewhat "underdressed" in the photo

The wife of Prince Charles, Camilla Barker-Powles, appears semi-naked in the new Royal Family photograph by Sergei Pavlenko, which can be seen at the Royal Society of Portrait Painters exhibition from today.

In the photograph, Mrs Barker-Powles, who looks like a horse, sits on the Prince's knee in her corset, which is sure to be seen by many as "a departure from the traditional Royal pose".

Mr Pavlenko, brother-in-law of the murdered ex-Soviet spy Paul McCartney, told reporters at the exhibition:

"It is a very tasteful portrait. The Prince and his wife love each other very much, and I see nothing wrong with communicating this to the world. The fact that she is scantily clad is of little or no consequence."

The gathering of Royals would have shown Prince William's now-dispensed-with ex-girlfriend Kate Middleclass, but, with the wonders of modern technology, Mr Pavlenko was able to airbrush-out her plain mug, and to substitute it with the rather more engaging face of the Prince's new object of desire, the model, heiress and all-round hot babe Isabella Anstruther-Gough-Calthorpe.

The bizarre nature of the picture is completed by the attire of Her Majesty the Queen, who can be seen sporting an Arsenal football shirt. Known to be a keen Gunners fan, she also wears a club baseball cap and sits with her foot on a ball, and the rest of The Family are arranged in a 'team photo-style pose'.

BBC Royal correspondent, ginger-haired Nicholas Witchell, said:

"It's different, but the Royal Family is attempting to move with the times. The pose by the Duchess of Cornflakes is, however, unguardedly raunchy."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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