Comedian Roy "Chubby" Brown was today elected as the new spokesman for the United Nations.
The articulated Brown, 55, was chosen from a list of 5 people who were thought to include Jade Goody, Bernard Manning and Basil Brush.
Chubby today released a statement on the subject. Unfortunately due to censorship we are unable to print it.
Basil Brush said "boom, boom" while Jade Goody just looked at us vacantly.
Brown will be the first person to speak at a summit this year for politicians who tell lies. George W Bush is said to be the star attraction.