Written by matthatt
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Thursday, 19 April 2007

image for Police protection for Knut following Putin insult
Forensics found fucked up fish filled food.

Celebrity Big Brother winner, Knut the Polar Bear has long been an outspoken critic of the Putin political regime and it's descent into the dark communistic days of yore, but he may have overstepped his bounds recently as he has received death threats and deliveries of poisoned Sushi, laced with polonium 210.

Whilst speaking at an anti Aids road show in Mumbai, India, earlier in the week, Knut let slip a few anti Putin comments as well.

Shilpa Shatty told Knut to keep it down but the bear would not be silenced.

The Aids awareness rally focused on India's muck spreading community, with Knut leading proceedings by shouting "no condom, no sex" in Hindi.

While he was on the podium with the Indian love goddess, he could be heard over the microphone saying that Putin was an asshole and should leave that nice Gary Kasparov alone.

He then dry humped Miss Shatty before taking a plane to Africa to adopt a small, to medium sized, orphanage.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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