Written by Monkey Woods
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Friday, 13 April 2007

image for ITV News At Ten's Sir Trevor McDonald To Say "And Finally..." Again
Outside Sir Trevor's residence yesterday

One of Britain's best-known forgotten faces is to make a miraculous TV comeback later this year, when Sir Trevor McDonald will once again front the News at Ten programme.

Sir Trevor, who is also Head of McShit, the unscrupulous fast food company, was axed along with the show in 1999, when it was felt that he was going senile. Now, though, ITV boss Sir Michael Radge believes that senility may be the foward for his network.

Viewing figures have dropped sharply in the years since the departure of Big Mac, and only last week it was announced that less than 100 people now watch News at Ten, mainly because it is screened at 10.30.

Sir Radge wants to have "one last try" to attempt to attract viewers away from the more popular, and better, BBC News with gorgeous Northern blonde sex kitten Sophie Raworth.

Former fans of News at Ten have complained that they miss Sir Trevor's charming 'BBC Newsreel English', which reminded them of "being in the 1950s".

With his trademark black skin and white hair making him look like a pint of Guinness, Old McDonald, now 93, was famous for his funny 'And finally...' slot at the end of the News, and Sir Radge wants to expand on that theme.

"We're going to move the comedy element up to the top of the show", he said, "and dispense with all the miserable, boring everyday news and tedium that depresses everyone and makes them want to kill themselves."


And finally...Sir Trevor McDonald also has a farm.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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