Written by Trevelyan
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Topics: Pope, Easter, Wicca, Rabbits, Eggs

Monday, 2 April 2007

image for Wiccans send letter to Pope asking for holiday back.
Pope reads nice letter from Wiccans

Vatican City- Today the Pope was shocked to recieve a letter from the Wiccans who usually keep to themselves. He was even more shocked when he opened it. Inside was a single page with but one paragraph on it.


Dear Pope,

While we are flattered that you Christians liked some of our own symbols enough to use them for your holiday of Easter, we have to ask that you give them back. Now we don't want to be mean, or put you out, but we sorta would like our holiday back. I mean, Easter is good and all. It's calculated using that phases of the moon, again something you might have borrowed from us. It's just, well; you've kinda taken all of our symbols. Rabbits, eggs, baskets, all that stuff. We are sorta the one that started all that and you guys just kinda took it. Now we aren't accusing you guy of anything, just pointing out that maybe you'd like to come up with some of your own symbols and traditions. Don't worry though, we'll still let you guys come to our egg hunts!

Your Friends,
The Wiccans.


While it has been pointed out many times before that Easter has maybe taken on some of the symbols of Ostara, many Christians steadfastly refuse to acknowledge this. They are even more vehemently opposed to the suggestion that perhaps this was done on purpose by the Church in an effort to overshadow Wicca with Christianity and perhaps steal potential members of that religion over to Christianity.

When reached for comment the Pope had this to say, "It's a very nice letter they sent me, it was done on nice paper. Unfortunately I don't have a clue what they are talking about. Honestly, we Christians developed those symbols on our own." Asked if he could explain further he had this to say, "Look it was well documented that rabbits were Jesus' favorite animal. He always had like four or five pet rabbits. He was crazy for 'em. As for the eggs, Jesus could make a mean omelet. We give them to each other to remind us how awesome Jesus is. And the baskets, well, they're, um....really good for holding stuff."

The Pope went on to say that Easter shifts about the calendar like it does so that families can hold it at different peoples houses each year, "It's a sort of lottery system you see," the Pope pointed out, "Like, Aunt June, if Easter falls between this date and this, we'll have it at your house, if it falls between this date and this we have it at Uncle Bob's" He closed the interview by saying that while he had taken what they had written into consideration he didn't see how there was anything to give back.

A spokesman for the letter writers, Priest Evan, had this to say in response to the Pope's refusal to give up the symbols, "We have every respect for Christians and their holiday of Easter. It's really just not fair that they stole all of our symbols just because they have to be stuck in a stuffy church for hours on their holiday while we get to be outside enjoying spring. I mean if they asked, we'd invite them over!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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