Written by Pointer
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Topics: Pope, Catholic

Thursday, 29 March 2007

image for Pope JPII Up For Sainthood: "It's Hard Out There For A Pope!"
Devil's Advocate Cardinal Carlotta Impriali

Even in the Roman Catholic Church, it can be "hard out their for a Pope" to be a Saint. A parade of Papas with syphilis, sons and silicone implants have failed the test for canonization. Even widely venerated Papa John-Paul Segundo (They chanted 'Santo Subito' [Saint Now! ] at his funeral!) needs to have miraculous proof that he made his way into glory. An anonymous nun claims that his intercession cured her of the same Parkinson's disease that slowly exterminated JPII.

The Nun's name has not been released and all saint-watcher's are hoping to interview the sista made whole before the Vatican rushes to halo-ing the Polish Pope.

Devil's Advocate, Cardinal Carlotta Impriali, in an unprecedented move, published his/hers objections to the slav's sainting:

"Yes! Let us say that a religious leader brave enough to take on Communism itself is holy despite the cowardly refusal to ordain women, welcome the dignity of Gay marriage, introduce true democracy into the monarchical church and allow grown adult married people to plan their families how they see fit and decide when their unions need to be dissolved for the good of all involved!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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