Since World Leader Idol is due out in April, where World Leaders compete to win the earth's affection, TheSpoof went in to get the latest scoop with none other than Simon Cowell.
We met him at his LA palace where we were instructed to perform a full bow as he was carried in on an ornate jeweled chair by his loving subjects. He told us that we may rise and we began the interview with a question of the goals of World Leader Idol.
"Myself and the producers were trying to look for a group of people who are stupider than our current Idol contestants. Look who won." said Cowell.
"But they won't be singing. God forbid we let them sing. If we let anyone hear Tony Blair's voice there'd be serious casualties. We'll just be judging their idiotic political prowess from week to week."
The interview was brief, after 2 questions we were notified that his excellency was tired of talking and that we were done. We backpedaled out, making sure not to turn our backs on his holiness.
We were given footage of the first episode, with behind the scenes footage which showed Randy Jackson practicing different pronunciations of 'Dawg', Paula warming up while clapping like a monkey with symbols, and Simon arriving on his elephant.
North Korea's Kim Jong Il kicked off the program:
"Well, this week I scared the crap out of some people, did some fine ladies, and got a bowl cut. Eh? Eh?"
Randy: "I don't know dawg, I'm just not feeling your policy on nuclear weapons, dawg. And scaring all those people, man, that ain't cool."
Paula, all while doing her monkey sybol clap: "Maybe it wasn't such a good week, but I could totally feel the passion in your eyes when you described it. You're so little and cute! I love you, North Korea is forced to love you, and the world loves you too."
Simon: "You suck donkey balls. Bye."
And George W. Bush:
"This week, spent some money, burned that new Dixie Chicks album onto my ipod na-ano. It's really great. I feel kinda gay for listening to the Dixie Chicks but I try to fight through it. It just re-a-firms my mas-cue-linity don't you think?"
"Ah, dude! It was pitchy, dude. You gots to keep it real now and then, and that wasn't it."
"What are you talking about? Maybe it was a little pitchy, but you tried and that's what counts!"
Simon didn't actually say anything, he just drew a picture of a dog taking a crap that he marked 'YOU' - which he showed to the camera.