Written by Monkey Woods
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Wednesday, 28 February 2007

image for Cameron & Cameron In Celebrity Life Swap Jesus Christ Discovery
Mr and Mrs Christ with their son 'Our Jud'

Opposition head honcho David Cameron and his namesake James got more than they bargained for when they agreed to a one-week Celebrity Life Swap experience.

For David, who went to the Middle East, has struck gold in his constant search for something worthwhile to do or say. The Conservative leader has unearthed two stone coffins from under a manhole cover in Jerusalem that, he says, may be those of Christianity boss Jesus Christ and his wife, Mary Christ.
He even says that the pair may have had a son called Jud, who may have later gone on to star as 'Our Jud' in the 1969 Ken Loach film 'Kes'.

That's too many 'mays' for some people though.

Christian groups are incensed. They say Cameron's guesswork undermines their bizarre notion that Jesus was resurrected three days after His crucifixion.

"We're upset", said Thomas Doubting, a Christian. "This undermines our bizarre notion that Jesus was resurrected three days after His crucifixion. To believe the claims, you would have to have a Titanic imagination."

James Cameron, meanwhile, has been unveiling plans for a 100,000-strong border police force designed to prevent "undesirables" from entering Britain.

The celebrated movie-maker, who has directed such films as Dark 'Angel', 'Terminator2: Judgement Day', 'Aliens', and 'True Lies' - all films with religious undertones - seemed to be enjoying his work as Tory leader. In true-Blue fashion, he accepted £2million in "donations", and, in return, promised seven worthless slackers that they would be awarded Life Peerages when the "big day" came around.

After the week-long swap was over, the two reverted to their ordinary lives, and said they would love the chance to do the same thing again.

James said how he was excited about making a movie about David's week, whilst the Tory leader, himself, said:

"Next time I wouldn't mind doing a swap with that David Beckham fellow."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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