Written by aningeniousname
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Wednesday, 14 February 2007

image for Sarkozy tells France "You're going to be my bitch"
Nicholas Sarkozy, the next French President?

Paris - Yesterday, in a major speech setting out his radical vision for a new France, nouveau Thatcherite plastic Blair model, Nicolas Sarkozy told a delirious crowd of sycophantic Parisians of his second hand, slightly used vision for the country.

Sarkozy began his speech by praising his great friend Prime minister Tony Blair, he then went on to compare France to the United Kingdom saying "just look at what more than twenty years of unadulterated Thatcherism has done for the UK, while we still work the shortest hours in Europe, they the magnificent Anglos march ceaselessly onwards to ever higher profitability."

Sarkozy then moved his attention to defence and bemoaned the fact France hadn't been in a serious war since the ill fated Algerian campaign remarking, "A lot of people say, we the French people don't like war and the lessons of the past have turned us against foreign adventures, I say rubbish, under my regime France will return to its rightful place on the international battlefield, just behind the Americans and the British."

Sarkozy's speech was greeted with elation in the carefully stage managed hall and apathetic shrugs throughout the rest of France.

Only time will tell if the famously bolshie French public will sell their soul to the CIA's latest shiny creation, on the evidence of this speech most serious commentators are betting they will.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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