Written by Chuck Terzella
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Topics: Iraq, blood

Saturday, 20 December 2003

The United States is getting ready to send a reply to United Nations Secretary General Kofi Annan's proposal for an expanded UN role in the U.S. Protectorate of Iraq.

Unnamed sources in the Administration are quoted as saying, " Sure, we'll let those guys have a role there... those blue helmets are so cute and the flag is just so pretty. It'll cheer the place up. As for anything substantial like running the place, that's right out. The last thing this International Coalition needs is a bunch of foreign countries getting involved. It's hard enough already; do you realize that the Iraqi's don't even speak English? Who would've thought the country was so backward."

When Spain, Italy and the rest of the piddling little countries currently involved in the Coalition heard the remark about English their Ambassadors each lodged complaints with the United States Proconsul Paul Bremmer, who replied, "What? does anyone know what these people are saying? Can't they speak English for Christ Sakes"?

Prime Minister Tony Blair, when told about Bremmer's statement, said, " Actually, that's the same feeling we have every time we listen to George Bush make a speech and if we weren't worried that he'd bomb London as well, we'd say so out loud."

Speaking on behalf of the Union of Losers, Thugs and Dead Enders, Ahmed Bull Durham welcomed UN involvement. " It's time we got some new blood in here.", he said, smiling.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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