Written by BluntScissors
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Friday, 12 January 2007

image for Bush Proposes Solution to World Hunger
A nutritious meal

George Bush has launched a radical and controversial new campaign to fight global hunger.

He said, "It is estimated that worldwide, a child dies every 5 seconds of starvation.

"Just imagine that. 1. 2. 3. 5. There, a child just died.

"My sources also tell me that every five seconds, an American eats a piece of gum. So the solution to world hunger is really very simple."

Bush's solution is this, once you've finished with your gum, don't swallow it or put it in the trash. Put it in an envelope and send it to the US government and they'll give it to Africa.

Science tells us that gum is actually very nutritious. It's a plant byproduct, just like paper, so it's full of wholesome goodness. 80 per cent of gum is sugar which gives an immense shot of energy.

Bush remarked: "You give it to one of those starving African kids and he'll be jumping around like a Mexican bean."

However, he did caveat that with: "As long as he doesn't choke, of course."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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