Written by Babaloo
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Topics: Guns

Wednesday, 8 November 2017

In the light of recent events in Texas, psychopaths from around the world, especially from the countries where guns are strictly regulated, have started wondering if they will ever have a chance to shoot someone.
Our correspondent had an opportunity to interview a Scandinavian psychopath who, for some reason, wanted to stay anonymous.

"Psychopaths and mass murderers in the US ought to know how easy they have it with their guns. Believe me, It's not easy running around half-naked, screaming, and waving an axe or a huge knife, trying to dismember someone".

"And if a fucker is in good shape, he might try to run or, even worse, defend himself. I said "himself", yet here in Scandinavia some women are so muscular that they might break your arm if you don't hit them with your best".

"This isn't very efficient in terms of man-hours. All this effort to kill one, possibly two of them shape-shifting lizards.

"Ah, to have a semi-automatic weapon - we would even settle for a tiny, tiny, gun, you know, for sissies. The one that women usually carry"

"Enjoy it. Your president and the people in the NRA are nutters, much worse than you. You'll keep your guns forever"

"Also, if you want to fool the authorities, just start screaming "Allahu Akbar" immediately before you open fire. They'll never believe that you are actually a psychopath."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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