Living in Australia can be expensive and travelling too (just like England) so one nutter decided to dodge paying his fare by hitching a ride on the windscreen wiper of a passing train!
Luckily, in Australia, it hardly rains, but shines, and during the ride he managed to hang on until the train driver thought, "maybe the rear window could be dusty so I'll give it a quick squirt!"
The train-surfing lunatic, who was hanging on at a 110MPH, would not have been seen if the giant wiper had remained static, but the sight of a human, living corpse swishing back and forward on the rear end of the train was curious enough to raise suspicions, even in "deadpan Aussie!"
The alarm was raised and, after pulling into the next station, a rather soggy, stinking of window cleaning fluid man, was arrested by railway cops as he attempted to do a runner!
During interrogation the man admitted being a complete butthole and promised next time to climb up on the roof, Indian style, lay as flat as possible whilst passing under a bridge (do they have railway bridges in the Outback?), never cling on to a swishing windscreen wiper again because it made him feel quite dizzy and swallowing window cleaning fluid is not quite like downing pints of Fosters, BURP!
Autralia is renowned for its macho pissartists, but this major pissartist deserves the bucket!