Written by Aspartame Boy
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Friday, 7 July 2017

image for Rony Tobbins hot reactor walk injures scores Japanese authorities say
Several walkers were consumed completely

Fukushima, Japan - 331 people were treated for horrid burns after walking on hot nuclear corium during self-help guru Rony Tobbins' "Unleash the Canine Within" seminar in Fukushima, Japan, Mr. Sukanigga of TEPCO said.

"It was ghastly", Ms. Hotenfoot told the assembled reporters at the scene.

She related, "Rony's teeth were so bright and shiny. They sparkled. So we believed every word he said when he told us we could walk on the escaped reactor corium. Now we're all going to die."

Tobbins led the seminar using Skype from the comfort of his huge bed and he is sending his condolences to the survivors along with a few cases of Diet Coke.

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