Written by Jaggedone
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Friday, 27 January 2017

image for French ban Coca Cola refills because it causes too many "Qui Qui's!"
French government claim that Coca Cola qui, qui is causing an environmental disaster!

France has decided to ban all unlimited refills of fizzy, sugar filled soft drinks because their sewerage system is overloaded and rats swimming in the sewers are becoming obese (those above ground too)!

French dentists have also complained to the government that their surgeries are over-loaded with people who have more black-cavities in their teeth than Swiss cheese has holes!

The decision follows a New York ban on fizzy drinks that has proved successful with NY buses now reasonably free of fatties claiming two seats and skinnies having to stand.

Instead of allowing binge boozing of Coca Cola and other fizzies, the French government have also banned French men from peeing in public pissoirs until the plague of fat rats has been culled, both subterranean ones and those living above the surface.

French President Messr Hollande, standing on his last pair of Frogs legs in garlic, gave the following warning; "Messr's et Madames, zis is our last warning; stop qui, qui'ing sugar filled pee into our sewers, only genuine, water filled qui qui will be allowed to flow, and if your qui qui is too sugar filled, we shall force you down below to catch ze fat rats!"

It seems the ban on fizzy drinks is already showing results in France as increases in the purchase of vin Rouge have increased ten-fold as the French are now determined to become sugar-free piss-artists instead of over-sized, obese, qui qui sugar-filled piss-pots!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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