Written by DeniseVasquez
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Friday, 11 November 2016

image for Donald Trump Is The King Of Russian Spies
Putin's Puppet

A top Russian diplomat & Vladimir Putin's spokesman came out of the closet Thursday. They admitted that Russian experts touched the Trump campaign more than once during the Presidential campaign and it felt so good. They said they were so happy Paul Manafort was in Trump's inner circle. Manafort was a favorite spy until Trump came along and showed him his penis, grabbed some pussies and became the new king of spies. Manafort was a long time Republican operative who'd advise a pro-Russian Ukrainian political party before it was ousted for a lot of corruption. Manafort left Trumps campaign after those contacts were made public, and because the media never reported on it, Russia says they feel very proud of their spies.

It's a little too late, but the U.S. government admits to thinking Putin interfered in the Presidential Election. The intelligence community concluded that Russia was responsible for hacking into the emails of the Democratic National Committee and Clinton campaign chairman John Podesta and gave the to WikiLeaks which released them. The Russian government says HACK YES, we hacked your systems & not only will we keep hacking your systems, we have the King Of Russian Spies Donald Trump now running your country & he will do what we tell him because we own him, his name, his businesses & now his country.

Many Trump supporters admitted they have never gone outside of their communities mentally or physically so they voted for the man who could bring Russia to them as a souvenir. One Trump supporter said so what if Trump is a Russian Spy. I love James Bond movies, and Trump is the greatest villain causing chaos since Heath Ledger's joker. He went on to say Trump knows Russia better than Russia because Trump has been there so many times over the years. He believes that Trump doing business with Russia is cool, because Trumps knows everything, and he even knows the terrorists personally and that means we're on the same side of business and America will be great again. Another Trump supporter said they don't care if Russians hacked our system, because our system was kind of hacky anyway. He also said he'd rather have a Russian spy in the White House than some smart ass, pant suit wearing woman President. He added he was so happy porn was on the ballot, and agrees that America is going to be great again because he finally gets to hold those naked photos of Melania & brag about jerking off on the first lady.

A big source says the FBI has had a FISA warrant for Trump's emails since October & they kept it a secret because it's a secret service sponsored and paid for by Wikileaks to help Trump win the election. The big source also says the FBI has been investigating Trump for his Russian ties but Trump supporters say that's dumb because everyone knows Trump's ties are made in China.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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