Written by Jaggedone
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Wednesday, 9 December 2015

image for Merkel wins Time "Person of the year" - Scheisse!
She is just so "wunderbar"!

Angie Merkel, German Chancellor, has been voted Time Magazine's person of the year and most normal people (are there any left?) are asking themselves, "what the F++K!"

Let's have a quick look at Angie's great year:

A) She held firm in the Greek financial crisis and was often called "a reincarnated Adolf Hitler" by poor, penniless Greeks driven to desperation and bankruptcy because Angie decided to veto financial help for the poorest of nations in the European community!! Well done Angie, brilliant work and being called Hitler must be a feather in your cap!

B) She opened up German borders, told all refugees they are welcome into the land of milk and honey, but forgot to tell Hungary, Macedonia, Serbia, Greece, Bulgaria, Turkey, Austria etc, that she was such a heart-warming, loving German before they built razor sharp fences around their borders to prevent millions of Refugees (mixed with a few ISIL terrorists) entering their already poverty stricken countries! Well done Angie you deserve the Nobel peace prize too, and then you can share your winnings among refugees in freezing cold camps stuck in front of barbed wire, razor sharp fences hoping to accept your heartfelt welcome!

C) Angie, wonderful politician that she is, also opened up a seething can of worms called German neo-Nazis by being so open and offering millions of refugees with impunity the right to enter her fabulous country! These morons were just waiting for Angie to open the borders and now are gaining in popularity because normal Germans are not scared of neo-Nazis any more; in fact they are beginning to love them again!

Angie Merkel, Time Magazine person of the year, congrats, I'm sure you will bask in your new found status and David Cameron, who loves you too, will be green with envy at your fantastic achievements!!

Last minute newsflash: David Cameron has opened up the Channel Tunnel welcoming thousands of illegals into the UK because he desperately wants to become Time Magazine's person of the year 2016!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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