Written by joseph k winter
Rating:
Share/Bookmark
Print this

Thursday, 19 November 2015

image for Pentagon officials and war planners to be given holy grail award for their grasp of the ISIS attack in Paris with additional recognition to CNN, MSNBC, et al
HGA award emphasizes strength and clear thinking

Stunned by the quickness and acerbity of its grasp of cause-effect on the problem of ISIS, the US Pentagon and assorted MSM organizations have quickly been recognized and promoted for this year's "holy grail award" (the HGA).

Due to widely broadcast analyses from these organizations the world now knows the Paris attacks can be blamed on:

1) The Muslim community at large for not stepping forward to take these unruly terrorists aside and talk them out of their planning;

2) Edward Snowden who alerted the terrorists to the fact their communications via smart phone, skype, etc. might be monitored by security agencies.

Confidential sources have emerged to say that following Snowden's disclosures a huge and collective "Ah hah!' was heard in sundry deserts where the terrorists gather.

One of them, who insisted on remaining anonymous, stated: "We had no idea and never thought of this possibility!"

As to the Muslim community's responsibility, the HGA committee insisted: Let us be clear. This is not over-simplification, stereotyping, demonizing, and stupidity.

That is, in any case of a violent attack, we should immediately look to that person's skin color, ethnic origin, and shoe size to immediately identify suspects fitting the same characteristics.

These people should be harassed, blamed, demonized, and hustled off to the nearest jail cell or concentration camp. After all, do we not have history to teach us the effectiveness of these reactions?

Recent acts of violence in the US by white males whether walking down the street shooting people, or while wearing a police uniform, should immediately bring the finger of accusation down on ALL white people from whose ranks these violent criminals have emerged.

As to more detailed analysis, such as US deliberate intention to use radical jihadism to fight its middle-east wars, including financing them and supplying weapons--this is not all that important.

Drone warfare with its outsized proportion of innocent victims, including women, children, and entire families, versus actual military targets exterminated should not, again, be given much attention.

Tearing up Iraq and Libya and leaving both territories in chaos and destruction really has had very little to do with what's happening.

Moreover, war is the well-known panacea and cure-all for the violence we're now experiencing across the globe.

As we do love fire analogies, we might say that the first breathless rush to use flame-throwers to put out a raging brush fire has long been understandable standard response in the face of rage and disappointment at damage already inflicted.

Additionally, and as reminded by rising war industry stocks internationally last Monday, the precept "War is good for the economy"--a statement attributed to the far-ranging mind and perspicacity of President George W. Bush--must not be under-estimated.

Make joseph k winter's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!


More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 4 multiplied by 1?

3 4 23 10
49 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more