Written by jd Balderdash
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Thursday, 23 November 2006

image for Michael Richards Calls Kim Jong-Il a 2 bit blankety blank 4 Foot Leaping Gnome

International tensions peaked today after Cozmo Kramer (Michael Richards) went off on yet another tirade in a Denny's restaurant after his over-easy eggs weren't delivered as over-easily as he (Richards) liked them. Spewing not only racial but cultural and international venom against everybody but God and Jesus Richards totally snapped when his flapjacks arrived without the extra maple and called Kim Jong-il the G-word.

Jong-il upon hearing about Richard's meltdown at the Denny's immediately demanded a U.S. apology not only from President Bush but his daddy as well who Jong-il, many believe, still thinks runs America. President Bush in a speech to the nation today said,

"I'm once again sorry for the .. in ad VERTANT words of Cozmo Kramer I loved that show, watched it religiously back when I was governor of Texas. I will not however apologize to Kim Jong-il for Kramer's Gnome-ish remarks. I'll invade Korea first, topple Kim's statue then send another 200,000 U.S. troops to guard the place til we can turn that country into a democracy like we almost did in Iraq."

Denny's already in hot water for being accused of racism stemming back to 1993 issued the following statement ..

"Michael Richards is no longer allowed in Denny's".

Jerry Seinfeld speaking with reporters today said, "Pretty soon Michael won't be allowed to even enter a Greyhound bus station" which many analysts believe WILL be Richard's primary mode of transportation if the Reverend Al Sharpton and members of the NAACP and half a dozen other ethnic organizations offended by Kozmo Kramer have their way with his pocketbook, bank accounts and Seinfeld residuals.

Kim Jong-il, unhappy not only with Michael Richards but President Bush's response as well again threatened to blow LA off the map with one of it's nuclear missiles. Just as soon as their scientists figured out how to get a missile to travel 20 feet off the pad without going ka-bloo-ie.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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