Written by D P Whitehead
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Thursday, 4 September 2014

Social media was a buzz with outpourings of immense grief, a sense of universal loss and then feelings of anger; after it was announced comedienne Joan Rivers, had died.

She was 81.

I will say that again...she was fucking 81.

"Devastated" tweeted Max from LA, "Horrific News" posted Janet from New York and "How could this happen?" shared John from Newport, RI.

There was no immediate word on a more specific cause of death other than "complications".

"How does an 81 year old woman with a history of heart problems just drop dead during unnecessary plastic surgery?" asked Steven Clark of Savannah.

Martin Shuttlecock of Fort Myers questioned how the President would respond to news of River's dead - calling the Commander in Chief "ineffective" and a "lame duck".

Neil Morris of Detroit called for an "immediate response from the White House."

Meanwhile, the Ebola virus is spreading quickly - with many more thousands expected to die. In Syria and Iraq a murderous army has emerged, hell bent on murder and the destruction of civilized values.

But more importantly - Joan Rivers died....

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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