MOSCOW - President Putin recently stated on Russia's version of Meet The Press that he will no longer just sit idly by as North Korean leader Kim Jong Un makes all kind of missile threats.
The Russian president said that one of his New Year's resolutions is to let Kimmy (as he calls Kim Jong Un) know that if he dares to fire one of his flea market missiles towards Japan it will be as if he is launching it at Russia.
President Putin said that he does not want to get anymore frantic calls from the Japanese government telling him to please do something about the out-of-control North Korean Cabbage Patch Doll.
Japan has informed President Putin that if he instructs Kim Jong Un to stop making all of his worn out missile threats that they will triple their imports of Russian vodka.
In Other News. The government of China has stated that if they catch the individual or individuals who are spray painting graffiti on The Great Wall of China they will be arrested, tried, imprisoned, and beaten on a daily basis.