New York, NY Chunky dictator of North Korea Kim Jong Un declared war on Panera Bread Bakery and New York City today. The portly youngster was outraged when Panera Bread was unable to ship bakery items to him since it would have to go through New York City first.
"That fat little prick has had enough unhealthy food to last him a lifetime," commented health-conscious New York dictator-mayor Michael Bloomberg, who also will not allow New Yorkers to eat unhealthy foods such as large soda pops.
Panera Bakery commented that they would have sent him the bakery items because, honestly, they don't care what the roly-poly one eats. But the request could not be routed anywhere except through New York, for some strange reason. And at that point Mayor Bloomberg stepped in.
"Mr. Bloomberg has been overheard saying that he just likes screwing with the little punk," spoke an unnamed source.