Written by Tony Bagodonutz

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Friday, 15 November 2013

image for Toronto Mayor Defends Behavior and Not Budging

Crack smoking on police cameras? Smoking weed in the streets? Popping pills, drinking on the job, hiring prostitutes, soliciting sex from employees. Mayor Ford has been in the spotlight for QUITE a crazy lifestyle, or so it seems.

With his agonized-looking wife at his side, Toronto Mayor Rob Ford publicly apologized for a crude, obscenity-laced denial that he asked a city staffer for oral sex.

Ford previously denied allegations of his attempts to attain oral gratification from staffers stating "I'm happily married. I get more than enough to eat at home."

He still rejects calls to step down from office however, stating, "I have modeled much of my career after Billy Clinton. I mean, he was a f*#ckin PRESIDENT of a country! He got oral sexed. He smoked the weed. No biggie, right? I mean, if I DID ask for oral, then well, ya know . . . and yeah, I smoked crack. He smoked weed. We know he inhaled. What the hell? Everyone's so uptight, man. I'm standing my ground!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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