Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Tuesday, 1 October 2013

image for China Recalls 17 Million Chopsticks
China is reporting the biggest chopsticks recall in the history of the country.

HONG KONG - China's national news agency, The Rick Shaw, is reporting that the Chinese government is in the process of recalling 17 million chopsticks.

A spokesperson for The Rick Shaw stated that the problem with the chopsticks lies in the fact that they are prone to splintering if they should come into direct contact with a jagged tooth.

The bulk of the chopsticks were sent to Brussels, Belgium; Casablanca, Morocco; and Bangor, Maine.

The news agency stated that several container loads that were sent to Copenhagen, Denmark are okay and that batch of chopsticks will not splinter unless they are struck by a sharp object such as a machete, a samurai sword, or an army rifle bayonet.

SIDENOTE: The Rick Shaw News Agency stated that anyone who feels that they may have received some of the defective chopsticks please check the top of the chopsticks for a model number. If the 9-digit number is 291053701 then that chopstick should be returned for a replacement chopstick or a full refund.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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