Written by Gary Potter
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Sunday, 8 September 2013

image for Evolution - European men get taller, their penises longer!
How big?!

According to the latest evolutionist bullshit, European men have grown 11cm taller between 1870s and th 1980s.

[Writers Note: Evolution, the notion that pond scum can turn into humans if left for long enough, is the unscientific claptrap which is being sold as unchallenged fact to all our children in schools and universities today. Any student who questions the dogma is immediately labelled a religious fanatic and ridiculed.]

'Professor' Chris Stringershaw of the Natural History Museum said that taller people were able to 'lose heat' better in dryer conditions and so were natually selected for, over their shorter stumpier companions. Quite how this marvel works in practice, we haven't worked out yet. Perhaps the taller people were able to see horses and carriages earlier and avoid them, as opposed to their shorter friends who were killed, thus unable to further reproducing their shorter genes? Perhaps losing the body heat meant they were able to stay cool as they made their escape whilst their short arse friends overheated and keeled over at the roadside? But since when does science have any baring on the evolution fairytale? Better nutrition presumably somehow helps with the tallness.

Following on from this rank stupidity, it means that penis size will also have grown. The penis will likewise be better at losing heat the longer it is, that, coupled with better nutrition means that now the average penis size for European men falls is at an eye watering 25cm when flaccid.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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