MOSCOW - The Russian News Agency, Vodkavich is reporting that President Vladimir Putin is extremely happy with the job that Edward Snowden is doing as the government's director of computers.
President Putin has stated that Snowden has already shown him hundreds of documents on everyone from Alec Baldwin to Zac Efron.
Vodkavich states that President Putin has just informed Snowden that he will be buying him a home in ritzy Beverlychev Hills, which is located just outside of Moscow.
The $1.3 million home is located across the street from famed Russian nuclear scientist Andrei F. Sputnikovich and three doors down from noted Russian spy Anna Chapman.
President Putin's niece Nadia Volgavich is dating Snowden and the Russian leader says that he could not be more happier.
Snowden says that he is doing very well with his Russian language lessons and so far he has learned 117 words.
He says that Nadia is a fantastic cook and he was surprised that one day she cooked him a Butterball turkey. He said he loved it and was amazed at the amount of vodka that Nadia uses in her cooking.
The NSA whistleblower laughs when he says that by the time they get to desert he has a bit of a problem trying to hold his fork.
SIDENOTE: Edward informed Vodkavich that he had no idea that Nadia was such a huge fan of NASCAR. He remarked that she knows all of the racers and their car numbers.