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Monday, 8 July 2013

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Pawned

An unknown White House source, today, revealed that when the presidential party was in DAR ES SALAAM, Tanzania, that Harafi, Munjabe, manager of the ground facilities at the Julius Nyerere International Airport, would not allow his jet fuel crew to service Air Force ONE, as the credit cards offered by Captain Tillman and president Obama to pay for the fuel had both been rejected.

Mark Tillman, Air Force One Captain, stated he was shocked when his USAF credit card was declined and was forced to ask the president for his. "I checked with Washington before we went on those campaign trips of his, and SECAF said we had an adequate balance that they had taken from the SS fund, so I wasn't concerned, Tillman stated.

After his card was rejected, Obama, accompanied by 14 vehicles and 35 guards, proceeded to 34 Ammani Street, where "Africa Pawns" is located, where he pawned AFONE for one million dollars, which was enough to fuel AFONE, and get the president and his family back to Washington.

The rest of his massive group was forced to find private transportation. It was later learned that he left the second airplane and 35 vehicles as collateral for his loan with "Africa Pawns."

Rick Hassan, "Africa Pawns" owner, agreed that if the loan was resolved in 24 days, that the transaction with Obama, which had been televised, would not be shown on Public Television. He also indicated that he had been contacted by a few "heads of state" from around the world who had offered him "substantial" amounts of money for the film.

"I even got a call from a guy named Priebus, I think it was, who told me to just name my price," Hassan stated, "I hope Obama doesn't pick it up, I got a guy in Egypt who says he has a billion dollars and wants to use it to "relocate."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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