Written by queen mudder
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Friday, 31 May 2013

image for Pyongyang News says Kate baby's gone down the pan
Bwahaha!

North Korea - 'Princess Kate water birth goes tragically wrong' was the headline on Pyongyang News Tonite** as the North Korean national broadcaster played film footage of a baby 'flushed down the pan'.

Notoriously picky about which news stories to show the plebs Kim Jong-Un's fave show is confident this time it's scooped the biggie by pointing the finger at feckless mom-to-be Kate.

This evening's broadcast was followed by archive footage of other 'royal' British babies' lavatory births - including one of Queen Victoria farrowing quintuplets down a Bombay longdrop circa 1867.

The late Queen Mother's own spawning of a human/boa constrictor hybrid also featured in the hour-long news.

A BBC NewsFright-esque follow-up discussion saw the usual bonkers officials debate this latest latrine-led trend, pointing the finger at corruption and western capitalism and bloody useless Western plumbers for gumming up already crumbling sewage works.

** See Channel 666/9-11 FreeperView or 007 on Pie-in-the-Sky News.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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