Written by queen mudder
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Topics: Terrorism, Bombs

Saturday, 20 April 2013

image for Spanish vibrator bombs a huge anticlimax
Early prototype of improvised mobile device seized in Spain

Pamplona, Spain - The latest terror must-haves are a bit of a damp squib a Spanish anarchy group admitted today after a number of explosive vibrators failed the 'earth moved' test.

Half a dozen home-made weed killer devices powered by pay-as-you-bomb cellphone detonators didn't go off according to ETA's Big Bang Sex Toys R Us group because the obsolete mobiles had long run out of credit.

This meant the incoming call that should have triggered an explosion merely kept the caller on hold, causing the package to start its customary throbbing mode and neutralize the device's propellant.

The flop may have saved several Spanish clerics' lives in a new terror campaign targeting the Romin' Catlick bishoprick [sic] of Pamplona.

Commenting on the seizure of several improvised devices during a Holy Week operation last month the local police chief claimed traces of proprietary sex lubricant had also been discovered, gumming up the vibrator batteries and accidentally forcing the mobiles into 'flight mode'.

"WTF?" Senor Manuel Tapas told QM-NewsCorpse stringers as news of the operation went viral.

A 200ml bottle of Spanish slippy sex oil retails at around 15 euros.

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