London - A classic 30-pieces-of-silver moment has seen Queen Elizabeth nod through tomorrow's lavish and unwarranted circus for a woman despised by millions of outraged UK voters.
"That's the quid pro quo for gold-digger Kate Middleton's 2011 public nuptials," a Palace source said today, "staged in a tacit Hellfire Club trade for this ludicrous Thatcher state burial."
The 'scratch my royal back and I'll scratch yours' arrangement means an extravagance of pomp and ceremony will greet the Queen 'just like a preview of what she too can expect' when her time to kick the bucket comes.
However the sordid Tory vanity project is being snubbed by 95% of world leaders, doubtlessly embarrassed by all the attention to an old Cold War ho whose secret relationships with the criminal fraternity have been carefully airbrushed from public record.
Also squashed from general debate is the Iron Lady's arms dealer son Mark Thatcher's £60 million fortune, amassed just before he was convicted of financing a coup d'etat in Equatorial Guinea masterminded by mercenary legend Simon Mann.
South African courts fined Thatcher 4 million Rand and handed out a suspended four year jail sentence for the crime, bringing in a lifetime travel ban to the USA where he's on the top of a FBI list of convicted undesirables.
"No wonder President Obama is boycotting Wednesday's shindig," a US embassy source in London commented, "no world leader in their right mind wants to be photographed atending such an event."
Wednesday's televised freakshow commences 11.00BST.