According to confidential sources within the Vatican Curia, Pope Francis has served an eviction notice on Pope Emeritus Benedict. The former pope has one week from Easter Sunday to vacate Castel Gandolfo or answer to the Italian courts.
The action by Pope Francis has taken the Vatican by complete surprise given his well-known humility and charity for all. However, it has been revealed that since Benedict retired, he has piled up enormous bills at Castel Gandolfo -- all at Francis' expense.
These debts involve non-payment for five cases of Dom Perignon champagne, ten legs of Prosciutto di Parma, and 25 gallons of Ben and Jerry's specially-created Benedictine Banilla Bon-Bons.
Attempts to interview the erstwhile pontiff have been unsuccessful, since he has been spotted "tooling" around the Alban Hills in a 300,000 Euro Maserati Gran Turismo Sport.