Written by Curmudgeon
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Topics: Pope, Mafia

Saturday, 2 March 2013

CASTEL GANDOLFO, Italy - This cramped hilltop town outside Rome is in its final preparations for the arrival on Thursday afternoon of an honored guest: Pope Benedict XVI, who will commence his new life as pope and chief molester emeritus.

Italian LGBT leaders acknowledge that their gay rights ship is missing its Han Solo. "All we've got is B-level personalities". They are thrilled that Britain's most senior Roman Catholic cleric, Cardinal Keith O'Brien, who recently retired in disgrace, will join the ex-pope as the LGBT leaders in Italy.

Meanwhile LA Cardinal Mahony says he's being scapegoated. Cardinal Mahony, who has vigorously defended his record, was already in Rome, posting on Twitter about the weather.

"Among bishops and cardinals, certainly the old guys who have been involved for so long, sure they're going to have semen on their hands," said Thomas G. Plante, a professor of psychology at Santa Clara University, who has served on the American bishops' national abuse advisory board and has written three books on sexual abuse.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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