Written by Lyndon
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Saturday, 16 February 2013

image for Meteor strikes obscure Russian region, no one of any significance injured
Chelyabinsk after the 55-foot wide meteor struck, but officials stress that no one noteworthy suffered

CHELYABINSK, Russia - A 55-foot wide rock landed in and around the city of Chelyabinsk and then caused shockwaves that injured 1,200 people and damaged thousands of homes. The U.S. quickly expressed relief that no one of significance was affected by the meteor's landing.

Although the rock entered the atmosphere at 44,000 miles per hour and broke up about 15 miles above the earth's surface, no one of any importance was waiting below.

Chelyabinsk is home to 1.1 million inhabitants and boasts a dozen universities, but thankfully, there is not one native of this city who has accomplished anything worthy of Googling.

NASA released today a list of other Russian cities with populations of over one million people that no one has ever heard of and wouldn't care about if they were to be struck by meteors. They include such whackly-named cities as Novosibirsk (1.4 million), Omsk (1.2 million), Rostov-on-Don (1.1 million).

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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