Written by Ron Kieser
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Topics: Pandemic, Adults

Thursday, 24 August 2006

image for Amateur Voice Acting Pandemic!
One of many different types of microphones used in Voice Acting

A world wide pandemic has erupted, effecting people from children to adults. It has become known as "Amateur Voice Acting". One of the most common sources that have infected thousands, is called the Voice Acting Alliance. Some may call this a monstrousity, but others call it home and a way of life.

When asked the question "What is voice acting to you?", here were some of the replies from various "Voice Actors/resses"
"A reprieve from the normal acting I've gotta do on real life. It's basically the same thing, but I don't have to look presentable. " Said Actress Pretty Kunoichi. "Heck, I'm sure there are a few who voice act in the nude for that very reason!".
Another actress, Ayumi Chan, answered as follows. "Voice acting to me is just the ultimate form of expression. I always love hearing my voice in fandubs and radioplays and always have so much fun recording. Voice acting's just a great way to fully express yourself without limitations. (and it's really fun acting like an idiot in front of a mic!"
The third in the series of interviews was answered by another actress named Sapphira. "An opportunity to be someone else for a few moments, to bring a character to life, to create a whole world of possibilities with just my voice."

This group of Amateur Voice Actors grows each day, consuming more people on this planet into its clutches. While many people are addicted to it, it is possible to overcome it's powers. However, in a scientific study by Prof. Hojo, "As soon as you get hooked in, you realize it is just too much fun, and quitting would do more harm then good".

Is it best to stay away from this pandemic? It has already spread to infect not only those who do the voices, but to the millions of people who have heard and seen these "productions". To avoid them is near impossible, and is best to just let it take you, to make a far less painful transition.

There you have it, Of life. Of love. Of acting like an idiot. While these dont speak for everyone, it seems pretty close. Beware of this pandemic, while not fatal, it can consume much of your life. Now I leave you, as I have lines I must turn in.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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